Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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