apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
23 People Confess Why They Don’t Talk To Their Best Friend Anymore
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.