smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.