D3 body, D1 cock
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
Randomize
