Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry Mr_Chuck_Norris hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(802): View more from Vermont

Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.

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(775): View more from Nevada

A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.

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(337): View more from Louisiana

Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta

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(540): View more from Virginia

Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.

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(313): View more from Michigan

he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.

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(443): View more from Maryland

If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think

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(937): View more from Ohio

Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.

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(425): View more from Washington

Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.

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(503): View more from Oregon

I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.

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