I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
