yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
