I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
I want a musical about memes.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
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