For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
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