AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize