haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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