My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Randomize
