doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize