So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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