Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
