She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
Randomize
