yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Randomize
