my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
