So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
false alarm. still invincible.
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
Randomize
