It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Point in my hangover when I'm honestly not sure if I'm about to puke, or shit my pants.
Randomize
