chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Randomize
