9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
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