Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
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she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
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If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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