WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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