Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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