Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Being invited to eat tater tots at 1:30am by a rly hot girl then actually only eating tater tots is a major let down. Tasty, but still a let down
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
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