why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I'm texting you from across the beer pong table to tell you that the drunk chick you brought over needs to disappear. like now.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're like the curious george of whores
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Randomize