I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
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I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
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Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize