I'm eating all of the evidence.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize