He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
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A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
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He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
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