So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Randomize