i tried to get you to come inside, but you insisted on throwing up in the flowers "because they're pretty."
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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