i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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