I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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