How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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