I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He has the fingertips of a God
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