I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Every time I started to really hate the guys on tinder, the universe throws me a muscly beardy bone.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize