I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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