You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
