He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
