just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
