Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Randomize