New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
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