It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize