What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Randomize
