just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
