remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
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Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
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Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize