shit pants at work. discarded underwear.
just showed this text to the guy at west elm. luckily we did not stool ourselves in the midst of the ensuing hilarity. so you're commando now?
yep! most awkward part is that i was a few feet away from a client, talking and looking him in the eye. i've never stooled while looking someone directly in the eye.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
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