So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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