I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
No subtext here. People are naked.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
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