All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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