Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Randomize