shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
